DEAR JOHN EDWARDS

--If you have a Halliburton-related devil and angel on your shoulders, listen to the devil. Make him defend it.

--Clean up after the mess Lieberman left in the 2000 debate. Remember what BigTime said regarding his financial good fortune during the Clinton years: "The government had absolutely nothing to do with it." John, you know he lied, now go make like the best lawyer in the nation that you are and fuck him up.

--You better have done your homework. Start out strong.

Love,
TFM

P.S. Kerry didn't suck, and neither should you.