VH1 SCREWS UP BIG-TIME

VH1 has just come out with its choices for the 100 greatest love songs. Check it out and you'll find that there is much to complain about here. Let's take it in batches of twenty (just as they present it), and then move on to their unfortunate omissions:

100-81: When your introduction to a "100 greatest" list is Poison ("Every Rose Has Its Thorn"), then you know you're in trouble. Then again, that song gets points for its use in the Simpsons, when Otto proposes marriage by saying "I'm your rose, will you be my thorn?" Dido's "Thank You" is a suspect choice, given its use in "Stan", a song about a more disturbing kind of love. The appearances of NSync, Enrique Iglesias (and no Julio!) and Ricky Martin in the high-90's are not easily forgiveable, though one could argue that no worthy songs appear until Elvis Costello's "Alison" (#91). Wham!'s "Careless Whisper" (#85) appears despite this awful line: "I'm never gonna dance again / guilty feet have got no rhythm".
80-61: Kudos to VH1 for "Sweet Child O' Mine" (#79), "Whole Lotta Love" (#71) and "More Than a Feeling" (#68). Last time I heard "I Melt With You" (#64) was in a friggin Burger King commercial. Other than that and Frampton, this batch is a wasteland. And ooh, there's that Goo Goo Dolls song, the one that broke the singer's writers block.
60-41: There are NO excuses for "Let's Stay Together" being stuck back at #46. The Reverend has to be in the top 20 for that one. Meatloaf at #42 is great, that song really gets me. Oh, and there's "Mandy"! (#53) My boys Journey make it on with the stunningly overdramatic "Faithfully" (#59), though I'm not sure I could justify putting it one ahead of "Three Times a Lady". Other highlights include overly dramatic songs from The Pretenders and Foreigner. "More Than Words" (#43) belongs, only because over the last 20 years, so many teenage males have tried to get chicks by learning that song. Not me, though (: Oh, and the Dirty Dancing song is in there somewhere, that'll do.
40-21: They get Styx in there, but they pick "Babe" (#26) over "Lady"!?!? I doth protest. I have a similar problem with Stevie Wonder's "You Are the Sunshine of my Life" (#31); I'd replace that with "I Just Called to Say I Love You". There's friggin Celine with "Because You Loved Me" (#30)... you have a feeling she's gonna make another appearance later on in this countdown? Kudos for including "You Are So Beautiful" (#25), "Wonderful Tonight" (#24), and the Carpenters' best song, "Superstar" (#35, though I like the Sonic Youth version more). John Lennon's "Woman" (#32) is an interesting choice, more on that later. One big problem: "Let's Get It On" needs to be a LOT higher than #28.
20-1: Let's go over each of these individually, shall we?
20 - "I Got You Babe", Sonny & Cher. Fair enough, for its historical relevance, they could do a lot worse here.
19 - "If You Leave Me Now", Chicago. Ah, one of the wussy-period Chicago songs. No reason to put it this high up, but it deserves to be in the top 100.
18 - "In Your Eyes", Peter Gabriel. This song would be in my top 5*. Yours too? Now let's all get frustrated at the songs VH1 puts just ahead of it.
17 - "Breathe", Faith Hill. Sorry, no soup for you. Guess I'm not a big Faith Hill fan.
16 - "Fly Me to the Moon", Frank Sinatra. Couldn't we find a better love song from the Chairman than this?
15 - "She's Got a Way", Billy Joel. Fair enough, though it doesn't make my top 20.
14 - "I Honestly Love You", Olivia Newton John. Riiiight. Well, if it makes it into those love-song compilation tv commercials, I suppose it deserves to be on the list.
13 - "Nothing Compares 2 U", Sinead O'Connor. A very worthy choice, absolutely heartbreaking.
12 - "How Deep Is Your Love", The BeeGees. They're the namesake for my old Rotisserie Baseball team, so by virtue of that, they're in!
11 - "At Last", Etta James. VH1 compensates for their picks of NSync and Ricky Martin with this transparently classy pick.
10 - "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing", Aerosmith. Oh great. You had to expect it. I like this song alright, and it sure beats the Faith Hill song from "Pearl Harbor".
9 - "I'll Be There", Jackson 5. There are kids singing, how could this possibly be a love song?!?
8 - "Your Song", Elton John. It's a little bit funny . . . this uh . . . this feeling... inside. (:
7 - "Endless Love", Lionel Richie and Diana Ross. Not in front of "Your Song", but I understand.
6 - "Unchained Melody", Righteous Brothers. Definitely top-10 worthy.
5 - "Maybe I'm Amazed", Paul McCartney. Wonderful choice. By a wide margin, Paul's best solo song.
4 - "Open Arms", Journey. If someone swapped the positions of this song and "Faithfully", would anybody notice?
3 - "My Heart Will Go On", you know who. Oy vey. That song sure worked, though.
2 - "Love Me Tender", Elvis Presley. For his one appearance on this list, they sure picked the right Elvis song.
1 - "I Will Always Love You", Whitney Houston. Hey, at least they can say that the #1 song is 30 years old! And hey, what did you expect?

As usual, the problem with this list isn't what's on it but what isn't. Let's start with the most glaring omission of all:
WHERE ARE THE FRIGGIN BEATLES!?!? Where are "Something", "Here, There and Everywhere", and my personal favorite, "Real Love"? (yes, the anthology song)
Where are the Rolling Stones? How about "Wild Horses", or "Angie"?
Think about it, appearances by Ricky Martin, NSync and Enrique Iglesias, yet no Beatles and Stones. Shame on you, VH1.
No sign of the Police ("Wrapped Around Your Finger", "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic", "Every Breath You Take").
How bout some Dave? ("Crash Into Me", or even "The Space Between")
I also noticed a lack of Jacko. Having seen those pics earlier this week, I don't mind.
"Fire and Rain"?
Where's Jewel?
And not one Burt Bacharach song??? Ok that's enough for now.

* Notice that I refer to a song popularized by a John Cusack movie by referencing another John Cusack movie, hehehe.