As you may have heard, Rupert Murdoch recently found himself on the verge of suing himself, after an episode of The Simpsons featured a mock FoxNewsChannel, complete with a crawler at the bottom of the screen.

Via Hit&Run and Bartcop, here is the complete list of crawling headlines that appeared in the episode:

POINTLESS NEWS CRAWLS UP 37 PERCENT ...
DO DEMOCRATS CAUSE CANCER? FIND OUT AT FOXNEWS.COM ...
RUPERT MURDOCH: TERRIFIC DANCER ...
DOW DOWN 5000 POINTS...
STUDY: 92 PERCENT OF DEMOCRATS ARE GAY ...
JFK POSTHUMOUSLY JOINS REPUBLICAN PARTY ...
OIL SLICKS FOUND TO KEEP SEALS YOUNG, SUPPLE ...
DAN QUALYE: AWESOME ...
ASHCROFT DECLARES BREAST OF CHICKEN SANDWICH "OBSCENE"...
HILLARY CLINTON EMBARRASSES SELF, NATION ...
BIBLE SAYS JESUS FAVORED CAPITAL-GAINS CUT ...
STAY TUNED FOR HANNITY AND IDIOT ...
ONLY DORKS WATCH CNN ...
JIMMY CARTER: OLD, WRINKLY, USELESS ...
BRAD PITT + ALBERT EINSTEIN = DICK CHENEY ...
RIGHT WING OF CHICKEN [cuts off here]

Heh. Hmm, I think that verse was Kemp 7:16.