"NO ONE CAN TELL YOU WHAT THE CHRONIC IS"

I've been a nerd these past few weeks and have been perusing various Matrix-inspired blogs, for philosophy, discussion and prediction.

But sometimes it gets better. Or is it worse? Anyway, Tom of Matrix Essays has constructed a Reloaded Gansta' Rap.

Excerpt:

Neo (rapping):

Yo, Cypher was a zero but I'm the One.
I'm the reloaded hero with the big black gun.
I was born in the Matrix, y'all, back in the hood
but I took the red pill and it went down good
with an Absolut chaser and a twist o' lime.
In the desert of the real I'm a bust a rhyme.

I can walk a tightrope after drinkin' a fifth,
stop a bullet in the air, slap Agent Smith
straight down to the floor, plumb through to the cella,
and I'm mackin' every tasty little Zion cave dwella.
Blowin' into your town like a pimp typhoon,
stirrin' coffee with my mind 'cause there ain't no spoon.

Oh god.

Read the rest, or don't. The problem is choice.